


it's too much (not enough)

by katlikestowrite



Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: Fluff, M/M, or something like that, scared mickey
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-06
Updated: 2014-04-06
Packaged: 2018-01-18 08:06:46
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 789
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1420840
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/katlikestowrite/pseuds/katlikestowrite
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Mickey is drowning, but maybe drowning isn't that bad.</p>
            </blockquote>





	it's too much (not enough)

**Author's Note:**

> So... I've been having so many Gallavich feels and I just had to get them out somehow. Also this is the first time I write gallavich fanfiction and the first time I actually finish writing something? so i hope it's ok. I'm quite proud of it. Tittle from Turn so cold by Drowning pool (which i chose radomly and has nothing to do with the story but still)

Mickey is drowning.

He's drowning in red hair and soft, pale skin. He's drowning in wiked smiles and lingering touches. He's drowning in an endless sea of green eyes. 

They have been fucking around for almost 2 years now and suddenly he can't seem to be able to breath without having his thoughts stolen and replaced by Him. Firecrotch. No. Ian. The seventeen year old is everywhere and Mickey can't get a ride of him. Everything is Ian. Everywhere he goes, everything he sees reminds him of the younger boy somehow.

Mickey is getting sick of it. Honestly he can't stand it. He feels vulnerable and dependent and he hates it. He keeps feeling shit, his skin gets chills when Ian touches him, his heart beats out of rhythm when Ian moans his name oh so softly when he's coming inside of him, "Mickey" he'd breath in his ear like it's a prayer. Once he even caught himself smeling the fucking shets where Ian had been laying the day before, siking for the boy' smell. And honetly what the hell is happening. Ian is fucking him up- well, more than he already is because he is a Milkovich, and every Milkovich ever is meant to be fucked up- but still, he can tolerate that kind of fucked up because is what he is. Is what people expect him to be.  
But this? This is ridiculous and scary and Mickey doesn't want it. He doesn't want to feel this way, he doesn't want to feel anything at all because now Ian has power over him and he's going to end up being his bitch, and Mickey Milkovich ain't nobody's bitch.

So Mickey tries to stay away, he really does. But is difficult to stay away from someone you work with, and even if he wanted to quit he wouldn't be able to because of his probation shit. And no, it's not because Gallagher got him this stupid job and he doesn't want him to feel bad due to him quiting. It's not.

But then Ian is putting chicken cans in the shelf telling him about the group home and how he can't even jack off in peace and how there is no privacy, and Mickey's mouth seems to has life on itself because before he knows it he's blurting the words out. And then Gallagher is looking at him in disleaf like he just told him he saw a fucking unicorn dancing in his shower this morning.

“Was I just invited to a sleepover?” Of course the shithead had to go and ruin it saying something like that.

“Fuck you is what you were invited to” Mickey snaps. He tried to make it sound like he was annoyed but he thinks he didn't quite conceal the fondness behind his words.

Ian just chuckles happily like he just won a price.

They finish work and then go to the group home so Gallagher can pack a change of clothes. The Milkovich house is quiet, Mandy is off to God knows where but she certainly isn't coning home anytime soon. His father and brothers are out of town in a run. They have the house to themselves. 

Weird thing is that after one hour in the house, they haven't fucked yet. They never just spent time together without fucking, Mickey usually likes to get fucked and then share a beer and a cigarret but they do not just spent time together for the sake of doing it. But here he is, laughing at one of Gallagher's awfully bad jokes and watching a movie and eating diner, it feels vaguely familiar but at the same time is feels unsettlingly non-familiar, because Mickey's never done this, this thing like hanging out with a friend and just sitting there doing nothing and talking. He likes it more than it should.

They sit in the couch and watch the movie, glacing each other from the corner of their eyes. Their shoulders and thighs touching, smiling a little when their eyes meet. It suddenly hits Mickey that this is exactly what the definition of 'date' is, they are watching a movie and having diner. A date. Fuck. 

Mickey feels like he's drowning. He's drowning in Ian's laugh and Ian's body heat. And he feels happy. It feels right, and maybe he's meant to be drowning. Maybe he's meant to be drowning in Ian and stop worrying because drowning feels like soft lips and hands touching and Ian breathing beside him.

Maybe he wants to drown, because it feels like the right way to die. 

Ian is looking at him now, smiling and bumping his shoulder, Mickey can't help but smile back.

Yeah, maybe drowning isn't that bad.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you liked it! you can find me on tumblr mickey-is-fucking-gay.tumblr.com If you want to give me ideas for the next fic feel free to do it! x


End file.
